Spring Break (make up for last week?)

---

maybe it’s like music

to slip to the other side

verse:

blue hum braided into the glow

liminal beings bothered into believing

and she says

verse:

            i know you can’t understand this

            this constant sleeping or leaving

            and i say         

chorus:

            the bones of fingers can’t

touch the shape of believing

            we’re swimming in your shadows

coloring the lines of the body unseen.

 ---

Remembering what poetry can do and maybe it just took a little sunshine soaking into my skin to remind me how simple and mysterious beauty can be, doesn't have to be explained doesn't have to be perfect just has to be. 

Day one of true Break but I started a new job and drank too much last night and feel a little queazy and still getting over the mucus in my lungs and still recovering from last week, big week, lots of ups and downs. But the sun the sun the sun and I'm sitting on my deck and feeling my cheeks turn pink but it's ok they were winter white and I;m wondering how far the light penetrates into my body can it touch my organs can it touch my heart? 

Been writing. Feels good. Might make it to the end.

Rebecca Week 8

I don't know about all of you but I am READY for Spring Break. I'll finally have time outside of school of work to just chill and relax and dedicate some real time to my writing. Whenever I have free time from work or from class or from homework, I really just find myself wanting to take a nap or watch some tv, just anything that doesn't feel like work. So it will be nice to be able to have some dedicated writing time but also having some free time to do all the other fun and easy-going stuff (assuming my jury duty session gets cancelled, fingers crossed!!). But my goal is definitely to do some writing for my thesis everyday, since I won't have any other assignments to really worry about.

I also just want to say how helpful the workshop was for me on Friday. I LOOOOVE getting feedback on my work and knowing what confuses people or what isn't quite working right so I can go back and fine tune things. It also helps to know that people really like certain scenes or moments that I'm quite fond of and enjoyed writing, so the workshop was overall just really helpful. When I got home that afternoon I just went through and read everyone's notes and feedbacks on the copies returned to me. I think that's always the best part of workshop, learning from others' reactions and comments. So thank you! 

I guess that's all I really have for this week. Wishing everyone a great spring break!! 

heidi wk8

the other week i felt out in left field when elmaz had us start class of with metaphor and i was the only one who didn't make it about themselves so here this is what i got for ya now:

i am meat
slow cooked
falling off the bone.

writing??? i have kind of taken a temporary leave of absence. thinking about it all has been a real weight on my mind and emotions and all that. resurrecting feelings i don't feel like feeling so i haven't been doing it.

of course the importance of continuing to write for my thesis is not escaping me but yeah, a needed break. as tessa suggested healthy rest, i feel this is a healthy break.

i did recently write a poem about a cowboy i met a bus stop and the romance of cigarettes and coke bottles and fantasies of a big bleeding texas sky. it was nice to write about something else, in a different style. "refreshing". undoubtedly inspired by poetry of my peers.

i am going home next week which always ignites feelings of excitement and fear. sleeping on the couch in the basement. sitting in heavy traffic. needing rides like i am 12 years old again. i'm sure everything will bring a lot up of everything.

i want to go to the museum of crime & punishment in DC with my friend karen. i want to treat my mom to IHOP and go to church with her. i look forward to the cooler weather, damning this 70degree sunshine. i'm going to see my grandparents and my dad & his wife & their kid & my uncle john & maybe my friend roxanne with the curly hair who recently moved to back DC from sweden and i havent seen in about 4 years.

sometime in the 80s when she had a perm and a rose tattooed on her wrist with the "womack sisters".

Katy's Eighth Post

My mother was going to come visit me, and now she can't. I'm sad, but it made me realize a certain yearning, longing that was missing from my character. I remember now--feel now--what it's like to yearn for something or someone, and it won't get lost in my story anymore.

I'm trying to focus on amping everything up, the longing, the tension, the vulnerability, the anger, the confusion and misguided assumptions, the way everyone gets carried away believing what they want to believe. Coming into the scenes from what they're feeling instead of what they're doing and who they are has been eye-opening. I understand the characters in a new way now, and it's become easy for me to write them again. They're fresh again, and I feel for them.

This also means a lot of major changes that I never thought I would make. I see now that the story we set out to write is rarely the story we end up telling. But it's hard to take that leap and trust that this new direction is the more powerful story to tell. I got so comfortable in what I had before--but, of course, that's a problem. I don't want to feel comfortable in my writing. I want to feel risky and tense and excited. I have to trust my instincts and let my story evolve. To do anything else would merely be laziness, and it wouldn't serve what I so desperately want to accomplish.

Week/Class 8 - Kendra

Prompt from Elmaz from a million years ago: 3 things your learned about your writing from having it reviewed this week and 3 things you learned about your writing by looking at others' works.

My writing after being reviewed:

• I focus a lot on "show don't tell" but somehow I always end up telling when I should be showing, or showing when I could just tell, and I have no idea how to handle this. I go with my gut when I'm deciding how to write some things, but after I receive feedback it gets confusing - do I take this advice or do I stick with what I feel is right?
• Messing around with style is really fun, especially when people report back on it. The two stories of Annie and Marin are structure experiments - Marin's being a block of dialogue and then a block of description, while Annie's is a bunch of description and barely any dialogue. The feedback I received on these was great because I really wanted to see how people would react to different structures, and that in turn will encourage me to push to use one of them more often.
• How much is too much and how little is too little?

My writing based on other people's work:

• I should look into spacing on the page and general style of my writing because I'm used to just writing and making paragraphs and changing the font face. I'd like to look at how I can create tone and evoke emotion from just spacing on the page, and that may come after the revision process.
• Looking at how to bring about emotion through my writing. When I read back my work, I sometimes I feel like the emotion I want to convey isn't being presented well enough if at all, and I want to play with language to see if I can become better at this.
• Go for it. Everyone in our class has a confidence that allows us to write some adventurous stuff, and I thought I was being adventurous writing about this hair-made creature thing, but I know I can push my limits and produce something just flat-out "weird" but not out of place. I'm totally inspired to write something out of my element and I hope I can do so and do more with the creature thing.

I was really hesitant coming into workshop on Friday because I felt my work was absolute garbage and I didn't want to hear any "Eh didn't like this," "This isn't needed" about things that I knew weren't needed, but I came out feeling really comfortable and okay with my work. Obviously I'm going to revise to my liking, but the feedback was helpful enough for me not to be discouraged and to keep writing.

Thank you everyone :)

Hey folks,

Now that I've been aiming most of what I write in the field of my theme, what was once intentional, in terms of writing with a purpose (as far as content in mind follows) is now becoming a little more natural. I wonder maybe if it is that my perception that's adapted. I see cats differently now. One moment the lurking animals appear fixed like solid, staring, statues they are, and then the next moment the furry fellow friends are leaping  to fetch water from a basket. That the basket was my hand doesn't make that the practice contrived, I would argue---though, nonetheless, there may, indeed be an art to attraction or that might just be my attraction to art, understanding and feeling out a scene is a new play in the works. Where and how does language form? What compels it? An epiphany perhaps? But those moments occur rarely and when we least expect. To say "to be present," to be in the experience, holds endearing, genuine, i shout, significance! Yes? yes? no?  Maybe. I do think it does. Engaging with life in form as the body does, movement and such. Dashing. A pool. A spoon. A loom. Hardship? Gloom? Naughty nightmares. Confusion. Absence where there is desire. Losing and forgetting. Time! Time? tiiiiiiiiiime.

Too, I'm thinking about how much, I admire some of the memoir pieces written thus far as the language offers narrative and voice, providing a tale to the reader who embarks on a journey as they visit and come to terms, or at least interpret some familiar and some unfamiliar realities, too. Bit by bit and piece by piece, this stringing along, hum drum poo paw! raw.

Week/Class 7 - Kendra

Judging by these posts and the emails, I missed quite a productive and fun class on Friday. The simple explanation to said missing class is exhaustion. I don't think I've felt any more uncomfortable, angry, frustrated, or nervous than I did last week surrounding all the events of the past two weeks, and as I type this I'm currently trying to ignore this anxiety-related issue that started after school-related problems.

Fun times in the health department.

Onto the prompt for this [past] week's blog:

My strategy for writing is overall backed by not forcing inspiration. We've talked a lot about what inspires and motivates us to write, and while I presented a list of examples, those are items that naturally bring about ideas, and I think that's an important distinction to make. I feel like I spend time thinking about what inspires me in terms of "What'll force me to write something" and I don't acknowledge the things that really inspire me without that pressure. Last week's blog was my acknowledgement and a part of the moment when I made that distinction, and I'm glad of it.

As for "physical" strategies:

• I play out scenes in my head, and sometimes I write them down, sometimes I don't and instead speak them aloud. 
• I like sitting alone when I write, or at least sitting with people who have no idea what I'm doing. It gets me out of the mindset of having to write for an audience instead of for myself.
• I like to eat. Refueling my body keeps my brain going and keeps me focused on writing instead of my stomach. And I eat while I'm sitting at my computer (I always clean my hands before touching my keyboard though, of course). I could take a break away from the laptop but...nah.

I'm nervous but looking forward to workshop this Friday. I was almost going to write what I'd like people to focus on but that's not helpful for either you or me. And I was almost going to start writing things here too but again, not helpful.

Happy reading! Let's go with that :)

Strategies

Still in the writing funk, or something like it, but getting ready to jump out. This week has been insane, but starting tomorrow, I'm focusing on nothing else but my writing and finding my sister a birthday present. So here's what I'll do:

Leave the house. There are always a million things to do at home and a million distractions, so leaving helps. Cafe's are good. Parks are good. Bars are good.

Have a drink. Whiskey preferably. Unless it's sunny and warm - then beer.

Put on a mask. It helps to pretend I'm someone else. A hat works, too, or some other form of dress up.

Make a time and stick to it. This is the hardest one of all, but I think the mark of a dedicated writer is their ability to say no to all else when it is their time to write. I've been trying to designate certain times and am finding that Tues and Thurs mornings until noon are good. I go to a cafe at 9 and write til 12. No exceptions. (Expect that almost every week there is an exception, but maybe if I keep telling myself there isn't, one day there wont be)

Rest. I almost never pull all-nighters. I'm always in bed at the latest by midnight. My mind does not function, especially creatively, when I'm exhausted and forcing myself to stay awake. If I'm particularly tired during the day, I'll allow a nap. Though I think being tired can be an excuse to not be productive, I think it also valid and should be dealt with. You would not starve yourself in order to keep working (well.. not always anyway..) so why deprive yourself of sleep? I also believe in the morning as a creative time, so going to bed early allows an early morning, too.

Take a shower. When I get stuck or feel foggy or unproductive or tired or anything, I recharge by taking a shower. It's like starting your day over.


Good luck to everyone and I look forward to seeing you all again on Friday!

week 7 olivia

Still in the funk. What is up. 

Actually was kind of nice to hear that everyone seems to be in the same boat. Misery is better shared, or something like that. 

I enjoyed last class and the feeling of community it provided me in regards to my thesis. The conversation about writing strategies was familiar to me but has surprisingly helped. I was particularly inspired picturing Elmaz in her little backyard studio and how this is her writing location. Over the weekend I was finally able to procure a table/desk for my room. I locked myself in my room for 2 hours this morning and felt inspired by my desk and the lovely morning light. I wrote! I revised! It was a satisfying start to the day. I think that sitting down at this special new writing table with the strict intention to write (even took advice and turned off the internet) really made the difference. Doing it again tomorrow! It's midterm week for me though, and just as we talked about, it can be hard to prioritize this work. 

I feel positive about the workshop last week as well. Very inspiring to see what everyone else is doing and was excited to see how engaged everyone was with one another's work. Thank you! Looking forward to hearing from you on what I'm working on. 

Rebecca Week 7

Apologies for not doing my blogging last week; I was M.I.A. both mentally and physically from about Friday to Thursday...missed classes...missed a paper deadline...I was suffering from this sad, semi-depression funk that *I think* I'm finally out of. This weekend definitely helped. Had the entire weekend off from work, which NEVER happens. Went to the Black and White Ball with some good friends on Friday night and spent Saturday roaming around Oakland and Berkeley with my friend and stuffing my face with Fenton's and CREAM (if you haven't gone to either of those to places, go now, seriously, SO GOOD). I had a lot of fun, something I've definitely been missing the past few months.

And now for the blog assignment - which strategies we've put to use. 

Since I didn't have work on Sunday (though I did have a bunch of errands to run that I'd been putting off) I made it a point to just walk into Starbucks, order my tall Double Chocolatey Chip and just sit down at a table and write. I sat there for about 3 hours with just my notebook and pen and managed to get a few scenes down on paper, something I've been struggling to do lately. I knew that I wouldn't be able to get anything done at home with all the free food and free cable and non-sucky WiFi connection. I think I would have stayed there longer if my mom hadn't decided to cook ribs and mashed potatoes for dinner...I was starving and that sounded so good. 

I also tried to just put my thesis at the forefront of my free time this weekend, I had a midterm to study for as well, but of course as it got closer to my midterm this morning I wished that I had spent more time studying and less time writing...sooo there's that haha
But the point is - just going off somewhere and giving myself that time to write without any other distractions really helped me be more productive with my thesis this weekend. The trick now is just trying to find/make the time for it on a more regular basis.

Also here is a pic of my sister, my cousin, and me all dressed up for an Obon Festival :)

Bonus points if you can tell which one is me! haha Juuuuusst kidding, pretty sure I still look the same so it's probably not that hard! lol
Look forward to reading and workshopping everyone's writing and I will (hopefully) be sending mine within the next few hours!

heidi week 7

hello!

things that help to motivate me/rituals for writing:
-i write down ideas/memories as they come to me code them into a title or vague triggering words such as "you're gonna get an abscess in your brain" or "the dale earnhart story" then come back to this list when i feel like i have the energy to write and kinda pick one or two randomly and go for it
-writing draft 1 with paper and pencil in a cafe with headphones and coffee or in a bar empty in the day time (nomad cafe / heart n dagger saloon is where you can find me)
-immersing myself in a way as suggested by marci, although most of the things i am writing about are from a place and time far away reading about events of the time, movies/music, photos all help to trigger my mind for inspiration. and always phone calls home. sometimes the weather reminds me of home..particularly the cool spring mornings.
-scheduling false class time into my agenda pretending we have class more than once a week.
-the colors red and blue. and i've taken to swimming at mills after classes, finding the monotonous pool sounds and color blue to be very mediating. afterwards i always feel kind of lighter.
-instrumental music and prince on repeat

some recommended instrumental music!
jurgen muller - science of the sea
emahoy tseque-maryam guebrou
fripp & eno - no pussyfooting
david axelrod
alice coltrane
bennetrhodes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GA1civ1m_v0
[emahoy tseque-maryam guebrou - mothers love]

thank you all again for your feedback this past friday, of course another helpful source of motivation for this process.

nancy & roger early 80s.

also after i wrote this i changed my bedding and felt inspired to write/share this:
with the recent increase in heat changing of the seasons and beginning to sweat in my sleep i've removed my heavy winter comforter and laid out my thin white sheet with this cooper family quilt on top. the quilt was made by family members on my mothers daddys side in kentucky who i've never met. beneath the contrasting blue white red patterns bloched with bleach stains and cigarette burns is hiding a wonderfully horrendous array of brights neons patterned and pastels sewn together. a lot of fraying. once when i was visiting home and bundled in this quilt in my old bedroom i asked my mom about it, where it came from and who made it and she asked me if i wanted it, saying i would take better care of it than her always burning holes in it. i crammed the quilt into a duffel bag carry on and brought it back to oakland with me. the colors and history are inspiring helpful and comforting to me.

Katy's Seventh Post

First off, I just wanted to thank everyone for reading and workshopping my piece. That was the most useful workshop I've ever had. Y'all gave me concrete things to think about and work on, and I really appreciate it. Thank you.

But I've been thinking about how I stay motivated and focused as a writer. It's really never been a problem for me before. I can write wherever whenever, provided that I'm alone. That whole working in a group to keep you accountable thing doesn't work for me. I'm a very private person, and I've realized that writing in the same room as someone else feels way too intimate, and this interferes with my productivity. The best I can do in a group setting is proofread previous writings. But otherwise, writing tends to come fairly easy to me.

The problem with this thesis project is that I'm not used to focusing entirely on one piece instead of bouncing between a couple works in progress. I don't really have the time to work on anything else though, and I feel myself getting bogged down in this particular world. So I keep myself focused by writing scenes in different perspectives. Well, generally in third, but a close third to different characters. That helps, and it makes me discover new things about my characters.

My other difficulty right now is the size of this piece. I'm used to writing short stories, and I don't think I've ever written anything over fifteen pages. This is so massive in comparison, and it's really hard for me to see the big picture I'm creating. I want to get holed up in different sections, getting the words sounding perfect, and then I completely lose track of what that scene needs to accomplish for the story as a whole. It's hard to keep all of the different arcs moving as one, and hard to remember what's actually important to the story. So if anyone has any suggestions for dealing with that, I'm listening.

In other news, I've had some difficult few weeks here, but it seems to finally be equalizing. And despite all this stress, I'm feeling good about my thesis. After workshop I was able to think about it with fresh eyes, and I made some interesting discoveries. I'm excited to get back to really writing, instead of just going over the same scenes again and again, getting them perfect.

Thoughts of the day from Kate in week 7

Looking back at old poetry today for some writing inspiration. Found this poem I wrote for my Poetry 1 class over a year ago. I was trying to sexually depict a man and break him down into parts (like men do all the time to women). Don't know if I really accomplished it, but going back and reading this poem is really getting me into my characters head today.

This poem seemed to come out of a moment of extreme sexual frustration. But it happened on Mills campus one day. I was feeling lonely wrapped in the warmth of the sun--laying in the sunshine when a beautiful specimen of a man danced past me in what looked to be tight swim trunks filled up with the tightest tushie I have ever seen. When he past me he was playing with a half full water bottle in his hand. The water was swishing and swashing like an uncontrollably yet contained monsoon. As soon as he was in front of me he paused and downed almost all the water like he never tasted water so sweet in his life. From that moment these words created the following poem:

Enjoy folks-

To the guy with the water bottle,

Don’t walk in front of me with feet dragging against the ground like two magnets forced to connect

They make what should taste like pink smell like purple

And what should slide like silk grind like sandpaper

Don’t slosh liquids around in plastic skin

teasing my parched taste buds with drops of wet

swishing and swashing

thirsting for a drink morphs into a steroid of strength

constructing masses of muscles to remove the impenetrably tightened lid that holds you in

Don’t bounce bountiful butt-cheeks next to tempted grabbing hands

who gasp at every sway of hips, vibrating towards their space of friction

they tickle my toe nails with every jaunting jiggle and shake

screaming for the chance to slide up and down the sleek stubbles of calves

don’t bottle your water, guy

tighten that tush

force apart the magnets so I can unscrew your top

Week 6

Off, too. Mercury in retrograde? If anyone is into that...

My time does not feel like my own. I sit down to write and the moment lasts only 10 minutes before something else comes up. Or until something else takes over my mind and I'm off and running somewhere, letting the words get stuck in my head and thinking later is always better but then it isn't because it's late or I;m hungry or I have to work or I'd rather play music or I think later later later.

What is working for me is coffee shops and early mornings and turning off the internet. On Tuesday I went to Arbor and wrote for three hours (was only interrupted by one shmoozy SF state grad student who wanted to know what I was writing then wanted my phone number). I need to do that more -- just get away from everything and drop into my work. The times I get to do this is rare.

Even though I wasn't assigned this task, I want to take the idea of three things that inspire me to write.

1. Rain - I love the sound, the light, the warmth of being inside. It provides space for introspection and a freedom from the guilt of wasting a beautiful day inside.

2. Beck - I've been listening to a lot of Beck lately. His constant innovation is always inspiring. This morning I just re-watched "Hello, Again," the 360 concert/experience/cover of Bowie's "Sound and Vision." It is a masterpiece in innovation and experimentation on many levels. Here is the link to the interactive website where you can control your viewing process:

http://www.hello-again.com/beck360/main/beck360.html

And to the easier-to-load and already-edited YouTube version:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnOmrDzRrGQ

3. Movies - Sometimes when I read, I get this anxious feeling in my chest that makes me feel like I need to be understanding more then I am. Like I need to constantly be learning something instead of simply enjoying the story and process of reading. With movies, I can relax, even though I feel like I gain inspiration for characterization, reveling of information, and general scene-setting. Also, I just love movies. Tonight I want to watch Almost Famous. One of my all-time favorites.

Kate's Week 6 post

Last Friday our group decided that we would blog this week about what is currently inspiring us to write. So, here is a list of what is currently inspiring me.

·      Going out on dates. As much as I don’t want to admit to going out on more dates when I should be doing more writing, I have found the “where the hell is my story going” question to be blocking me from moving forward in my writing. Then I thought, maybe I need more material to work with. I went on three more dates with one ‘new’ guy and every time I went out with him all I could think was this is it. This is the end of my story. So maybe my inspiration is actually going out and experiencing more of what I am trying to talk about.

·      Watching the T.V. show Charmed on Netflix. I’m not entirely sure what inspired me to start watching this 90’s show, but once I did I was hooked. Its about three sisters who discover they are witches and deal with a series of mysterious obstacles throughout the years while also dating and trying to keep their witchy ways a secret. But in relation to my story: these women are dating in mass numbers and they have no idea what they want or what they are doing with their lives. This is definitely relatable with my character and is helping me hash things out and slow things down in the sex scenes because I am taking into consideration all the things that women think about. And since we think about everything all the time—even during sex—every time I watch it—I go into my story and start making immediate connections on how I can make this idea work in my story.

·      Reading my required reading for American Literature 2. I don’t know why, but for some reason all the books, or most of them at least, that I am reading for this class have parallels with my story. For example: Maggie, Girl of the Streets by Stephen Crane, is about a girl whose environment and status as an invisible woman push her down the path of prostitution. While my character is not a prostitute, this story forces me to consider the fact that women do things because or are programmed to do things by first taking consideration of the male gaze. Male Gaze is strongly interwoven into our society and this book makes me consider how this construction affects being a woman and being a sexual woman. Why is my character concerned with the fact she is acting slutty? Why is she even aware of the fact that she is being what is considered slutty? Is my character silenced by the men she dates, how she thinks she is expected to act on her dates or by preconceived notions of what is engrained into her psyche of what it means to be woman? Another book we just finished reading is The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway is about a man and a woman who fantasize about being together but never can sexually because of his penile war injury. This is another interesting dynamic because in this novel the woman is very promiscuous but can never actually be with the man she truly desires. Two books that I did not expect to pull from, but really got my inner thoughts moving on my story.

Inspiration comes when you least expect it sometimes I guess.

Cheers

Week 6

In Heidi's words, I've been pretty off lately. Gosh I'm in a funk. Don't know if it's these day after day white skies letting in bare, blank light or just this sense of impending doom when I think about the future. Ha, okay a little dramatic, but nonetheless I've been pretty off lately. 

I feel like my posts may be a little redundant. Complaining about not knowing what to do with myself, with the writing process, etc. I guess it's happening as I suggested last time that it was, but it's just all a lot more slow of a process than I would have thought. I am relieved to workshop with the class tomorrow though, as I feel like it will be a nice break from being so stuck and caught up in my work. I miss the feeling of a workshop class because being around other people generating work inspires me. 

a snack.

Hey, hey
 senior thesis cohort,

The poet and critical essayist, Rachel Dupleiss, reading this evening in the mills hall living room; it was an inspiring event.

Afterwards, I went to the library and wrote this poem, which thought I would share :)


it's entitled:

Food in the Library

The jacket is nifty
The jacket is nifty

Torn on the side

Each piece is a tearing fray

Hello goblet
Shredding

Who is gobbing in this room
confess to your gobbing
        its a sure fit.

Tickled toes are in the bath's context.

The action of pouring is not candid.
The wopping and galopping.

Mystery is approaching water in shock.

Trust is the stun garmet stripping path or lose, if this is a quest
guess: narrate roses and see may and bloom.

Does she. Does "she." Wobble red
painting morning,
           a calm breath.

week...6? heidi

i've been pretty off lately. i suspect my mail has been going undelivered the past two days. my stomach has a nervousness. sense of pending. have been writing but mostly avoiding it because it feels emotionally draining. often thinking i'll sit down to write a scene but end up writing everything up until "that moment" of the scene begins. tell myself i will come back to it later, then don't. obvious avoidance.

been listening to a lot of prince, eating a lot of burritos, thinking about religion. interested in televangelism. non-denominational churches. choir singing.

i ran out of mills free prints, officially paying for it. "next purse" they call it.

i am going home over spring break for six days. cherry blossoms.

nancy & tim. 2010.

Week/Class 6 - Kendra

As Katy had mentioned in her blog, our group is struggling to find inspiration - I know in particular I'm struggling so hard, but some magic happens. Some.

For this week's blog (which is finally on time) I too will list my current inspirations:

• My secret assignment I mentioned had to do with pro wrestling, so this wonderful promo (promotional speech in this case) by one of my favorite wrestlers, CM Punk, always gets me fired up and brings out the defiant side of me which I definitely need for at least one of my characters.
• This is weird, but I've been staring at people's hair while they're talking to me to notice texture, style, length, volume, etc. I also ask them about their hair or how they feel about hair in general, just so it's less creepy.
• Listening to more pop/dance/mainstream hip hop music of these past three years to make me feel 18 again, which is the age of my characters. I have lost some brain cells and patience in the process.
• Margaret and I had a chat about a lot of things, but in particular looking at hair in the world of pro wrestling. Men's hair is an entirely different animal, but for women it was easier since it's women and all they do is flip their hair, right? Here's the ring entrance of one of my favorite WWE Divas, Maryse. And here's the ring entrance of a newer Diva, Summer Rae (the blonde-haired one). Both are tall, platinum blonde-haired "white" women and are very narcissistic, evil geniuses in some sense, which is interesting to me because the villainous women in wrestling who are non-white have no relation to their hair in terms of it being a part of their identity. The most I've seen is black women getting upset when their tracks are ripped out, but no one has a real character that revolves around their hair. This raises the question: what does that say about non-white vs. white women?
• My mom's stories - she is Navajo and the inspiration for this entire thesis so I've been asking her about hair and what it means in her culture, in her family, and in her own life. I also am more mature at this point in my life, so I can politely ask her why I haven't ("can't") cut my hair and she was allowed to cut her own, despite telling me what her mother told her.
• My other stories - I'm always writing, so I have other stories I'm working on outside of schoolwork to keep me sane and keep me writing. Whenever I have to describe someone's hair, I always stop and see if I've done the same in this project, and if I haven't, how can I incorporate? How am I writing stories differently from each other to keep interest? Is this way working, or is it not working? How can I make it work?